How To Handle People That Don't Park Within The Lines

"Bill Caswell" (billcaswell) 09/08/2015 at 13:10 • Filed to: None

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I see this all the time. Some person thinks their car is more precious than others and takes up two spots to ensure no one gets anywhere near it. My friends tell me it’s ok if you park at the far end of the parking lot where it’s empty, but for the most part these asshats do it close to the store where they’re shopping.

Some people wedge their car into the mini spot next to the person preventing them from opening their doors, but sometimes that results in a major backlash... !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! Other times they simply !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! If the offense happens in Russia.

Last week I came across !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! It’s a little note to leave on their windshield that is far more amusing. Especially if you see the person when they read it. I hear they go nuts. I also included a high res copy on Build Race Party so you can download it, make copies, and use it yourself. You can !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!!

McLarry > Bill Caswell 09/08/2015 at 13:13

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Saw this a couple days ago and made a mental note to track it down and print it later - thanks for reminding me :P

spanfucker retire bitch > Bill Caswell 09/08/2015 at 13:14

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I like these.

http://youparklikeanasshole.com/files/notice_1…

Party-vi > Bill Caswell 09/08/2015 at 13:15

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F that. Just reach on in, take the parking brake off and nudge it into neutral.

fourvalleys > Bill Caswell 09/08/2015 at 13:17

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My friends tell me it’s ok if you park at the far end of the parking lot where it’s empty

But if it’s so empty, why are you worried about people parking next to you...?

spanfucker retire bitch > Party-vi 09/08/2015 at 13:18

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And then you can gently nudge it down an empty hill.

jariten1781 > Bill Caswell 09/08/2015 at 13:19

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I just park somewhere else and don't let small annoyances ruin my day.

Party-vi > spanfucker retire bitch 09/08/2015 at 13:20

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Nah - I’d try to roll it into the kart return.

Tareim - V8 powered > Party-vi 09/08/2015 at 13:20

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what about the steering lock?

Party-vi > Tareim - V8 powered 09/08/2015 at 13:23

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Does the steering lock also lock the transmission in neutral and apply the parking brake? The wheels are turned just enough to make a beautiful arc as this little Saturn backs into another car or a light post.

Nibby > Bill Caswell 09/08/2015 at 13:24

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CaptDale - is secretly British > Bill Caswell 09/08/2015 at 13:39

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YOU PARK LIKE AN ASSHOLE

I have a stack of these in my car. Used one just the other day.

CaptDale - is secretly British > spanfucker retire bitch 09/08/2015 at 13:41

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lol came here to say the same thing.

Tareim - V8 powered > Party-vi 09/08/2015 at 13:44

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why would you want to make it crash into another car? that’s unfair on the other person

HammerheadFistpunch > Bill Caswell 09/08/2015 at 13:46

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I’ve used this one in the past

in fact I think I still have a few in my glovebox

Party-vi > Tareim - V8 powered 09/08/2015 at 13:47

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Because I am an awful person.

E92M3 > Bill Caswell 09/08/2015 at 14:10

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THIS is the reason I keep 1 of my son’s pieces of sidewalk chalk in the car at all times.

desertdog5051 > Bill Caswell 09/08/2015 at 14:24

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If you let every kind of asshole on this planet bother you, then you need to get a life. Sure, nobody cares for that kind of thing but I don’t see any reason to get all twisted over it. Chill and just move on.

MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner > Bill Caswell 09/08/2015 at 14:25

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I think it’s perfect. Hit’s them hard but doesn’t do any actual damage.

Perfect combo my friend.

BorkBorkBjork > Bill Caswell 09/08/2015 at 14:41

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The best way to handle them is to ignore them, not throw shit in their car.

crown victor victoria > Bill Caswell 09/08/2015 at 14:54

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Parking next to the cart return is asking for a ding in and of itself. So this kind of cancels out.

iSureWilll > Bill Caswell 09/08/2015 at 15:36

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Hahahaha Elton John in the passenger seat :)

BREADwagon > Bill Caswell 09/08/2015 at 16:13

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I never really got taking up multiple spots. I normally just park in the furthest parking spot from the entrance, and 99% of the time no one parks next to you. 1% of the time, a friend will appear: either a clean ride or the same make/model as you.

Taking 2 spots just makes people inordinately pissed, and some one as equally douchey will go out of their way to park next to you very closely, even if it was a spot they weren’t going to take before.

Berang > Bill Caswell 09/08/2015 at 17:18

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The more people complain about it, the more satisfying their complaints become.

Urambo Tauro > Bill Caswell 09/08/2015 at 19:46

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I would totally park here, about one inch away from the mirror-tip.

Funktheduck > BREADwagon 09/08/2015 at 22:32

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I parked far away for lunch one day this summer to get the tiny bit of shade the tiny trees made. My car’s twin parked next to me. We were the only 2 in that corner

Bill Caswell > fourvalleys 09/09/2015 at 12:41

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I asked the exact same thing. They said when the front part of the lot was crowded but the back of the lot was empty they felt it was ok to take up two spots for protection.

Bill Caswell > desertdog5051 09/09/2015 at 12:43

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Agreed. I think its more of a small town thing where you keep seeing the same guy parking like an asshat over and over. And after a few times of going to pull into a spot only to find he’s using half of it, you pull out a turtle and leave it for him.

Bill Caswell > BorkBorkBjork 09/09/2015 at 12:43

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Is that your car in the photo? Or have people left you a lot of these types of notes?

BorkBorkBjork > Bill Caswell 09/09/2015 at 12:51

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Neither

desertdog5051 > Bill Caswell 09/09/2015 at 15:29

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I agree. And that comment was aimed at no one in particular. If it’s a regular thing, like someone at work, then they should get one.

fourvalleys > Bill Caswell 09/09/2015 at 18:30

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That logic... it makes no sense!

By the way, did I hear a rumor you’re back in Chicagoland for a bit? If you’re around this weekend, are you planning to go to ZF for Vintage Fest on Sunday? I figured Chris asked you (BMWs and such), but I figured I’d ask too.

I may show up by the very end, but I’ll have the Mini at a different show. Should be a good time either way!

Bill Caswell > fourvalleys 09/10/2015 at 22:13

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I am in Chicago but will miss the ZF vintage deal(chris did ask me) because Im headed to LA tomorrow for the Red Bull GRC race. Then three weeks at the beach in N. County San diego followed by three more weeks in LA. Then Chicago for a week, then Mid Ohio for AER then SEMA.

fourvalleys > Bill Caswell 09/11/2015 at 08:18

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Nice! Turns out I probably won’t make it to ZF at all either (now that I know it ends before the British show ends).

Anyway, safe travels!